Snooty Wafflehump

My mom brightened my day with this forward earlier. Her Subject line
was "Boobie Potty-Shorts" The idea was that you followed the
instructions and then sent back to the person that sent it to you and
forwarded to your entire address book with your new "name" as the
subject line. I prefer blogging. Feel free to comment back with your
new name.

As I understand, this is an excerpt from a children's book, Captain
Underpants And the Perilous Plot Professor Poopypants, by Dave Pilkey,
in which the evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...

So:-

1. Use the third letter of your first name to determine your New first name:

a = snickle
b = doombah
c = goober
d = cheesey
e = crusty
f = greasy
g = dumbo
h = farcus
i = dorky
j = doofus
k = funky
l = boobie
m = sleezy
n = sloopy
o = fluffy
p = stinky
q = slimy
r = dorfus
s = snooty
t = tootsie
u = dipsy
v = sneezy
w = liver
x = skippy
y = dinky
z = zippy

2. Use the second letter of your surname to determine the first half
of your new last name:

a = dippin
b = feather
c = batty
d = burger
e = chicken
f = barffy
g = lizard
h = waffle
i = farkle
j = monkey
k = flippin
l = fricken
m = bubble
n = rhino
o = potty
p = hamster
q = buckle
r = gizzard
s = lickin
t = snickle
u = chuckle
v = pickle
w = hubble
x = dingle
y = gorilla
z = girdl e

3. Use the third letter of your surname to determine the second half
of your new last name:

a = butt
b = boob
c = face
d = nose
e = hump
f = breath
g = pants
h = shorts
i = lips
j = honker
k = head
l = tush
m = chunks
n = dunkin
o = brains
p = biscuits
q = toes
r = doodle
s = fanny
t = sniffer
u = sprinkles
v = frack
w = squirt
x = humperdinck
y = hiney
z = juice

And remember that children laugh an average of 146 times a day; adults
laugh an average of 4 times a day.

Its Only Tuesday

But I should rejoice because I guess that means tomorrow is like
Thursday, and at least I am fortunate enough to be able to say that.
However, considering I am in a "Its Only Tuesday" sort of mood, the
idea of being here until 6:00 today is less than comforting.

The day has been so long I seriously just had someone ask me, "So,
what did you do last night?" And after I responded they went, "Oh
yeah, you told me this morning." The day has been that long.

I attribute the excessive lengthiness of the day to one of my most
favorite 5-syllable words...

T R A C E A B I L I T Y

Isn't it beautiful?

I shall take solace in a wine tasting and dinner plans with the guys
from our Agency. They are in town for what I imagine will be one of
the last times. It will be nice to visit and converse with them. I
have had the pleasure to talk with Sean several times, but rarely
Eric.

I also seem to be stupid hungry today. I think it started with me
getting a late start this morning (alarm didn't go off), thus I did
not really have breakfast. Just a glass of juice and a piece of toast
with apple butter. I have spoiled myself with protein in the morning.
It really does make a difference. I also missed out on coffee. My
sesame chicken lean cuisine lunch was less than filling and since then
I have probably eaten 10 peppermints, a 100 cal pack of reeces snacks,
and a 100 cal pack of lays crackers. I want cheese and meat. I am
hungry.

Food - Bleh.

But, my M&P traceability matrix is to the BSD level - I need to finish
it. I can knock it out today, but I am being lazy...and this has only
managed to occupy 5 minutes.

Tick tock, Tick tock.

Kitty Khronicles: Week 2

King Sebastian had a pretty average week. The new comforter I got has
proven to of great interest to him though. He likes to randomly attack
it. I think it has to do with the sound it makes. (His eyes happen to
match the bedspread too - which is neat.) The new cotton is sort of
crunchy - I guess that is how to explain it. He also he likes to be
under the covers, which is really annoying - more often than not he is
kicked out of the room when it is time to go to bed.

The big find for the week was a laser pointer. I got it last night. I
was sort of annoyed with all of his playfulness and needed a way to
tire him out. Man - he goes, and goes, and goes...like a little
energizer kitty.

I also got a spray bottle to start deterring some behaviors. I don't
know how well it is going to work though. When I squirt him he stops
what he is doing, but just long enough to look around and see what the
deal is. Then he goes back to it. I am not sure he dislikes water so
much. Time will tell.

He really is a sweet cat though. More often than not he just wants to
be next to me, and is very good at napping on the sofa. If only we can
get bedtime straightened out..

A "Meh" Sort of Day

OK - the Coldplay concert Tuesday rocked (more will come on that
later). Problem was that I got caught up doing some stuff for work +
felt like total crap that day so I got down there later than I wanted
to. In fact, I stopped and took a nap at a rest area for about an hour
because I felt so crummy. The show got over around 10:30, so I was on
the road heading home by 11:30 and including one 15 min stop to get
fuel and late night munchies, I made it to my bed at around 2:30. Poor
kitty though, he was very excited for me to be home, but I immediately
locked him out of the bedroom so I could go to sleep.

Yesterday at work was miserable, yet productive. I felt like poo and
was exhausted but managed to make a ton of progress on my BSD. That
included reading all 122 pages of it from front to back in order to
really identify all the open questions. I am down to 5 that need to be
addressed and then we should be ready to submit. The goal is to do
that tomorrow.

After work I was itching to get some sleep and not super hungry, but
guessed I would be later. I opted to roll into the restaurant to visit
for a few and grab some takeout. Got home about 6:30 and slept a
little over an hour but was not hungry. So, I played a bit of guitar
hero and watched some episodes of CSI and Mythbusters, made myself
drink a cup of broth and eat some crackers then I went to bed at 10.
At 5:$5 I turned the alarm off to get up, but then it was suddenly
7am. Eek. Made it to work at 7:30 though.

Honestly, 6pm cannot get here soon enough cause I want to go straight
home and go to sleep again. I didn't really recognize myself in the
mirror this morning. I look terrible. For lunch I went and had miso
soup and sushi with a friend from work - it was good to visit - we had
not seen each other in several weeks. I think the soup might have made
me feel a little better, so that's good.

Suppose to have a big weekend going on - I need to get to feeling
better so I can live it up.

The Value of Being a Good Person

I am struggling with issues of character and personality. I believe I'm the sort of person that has a good level of integrity, uses good judgment, and tries to do what is right. I also take initiative, tend to serve well in leadership roles, and can execute well working alone or as part of a team. All these things make me a good employee and business person. These qualities make up a good portion of who I am and tend to make up a significant portion of my personality. When you blend all of that with the fact that I also consider myself to be a caring person that doesn't like to hurt peoples feelings, and the fact that once I make my mind up about something I am fully committed and give myself wholly to it...you end up with a person that is terribly process oriented, analytical, is very vulnerable to emotions, but wears a mask that pretends to make everything OK. I often rationalize why things might hurt me or why things can't be the way I want them to be. I might be too smart for my own good.

In most situations I would say that all of these qualities are something that people would look for in a relationship - but I am beginning to learn that might not be the case.

Your Complaint: Too independent. Has the ability to take initiative and make things happen. I think: Don't I have to be able to take care of myself before I can take care of a relationship or any needs you may have?
My assumption: You are used to needy girls and guess you are not man enough to step up and face a challenge.

Your Complaint: You're a good person. Very sweet. So genuine. You deserve better than me.
I think: Don't you think I am competent enough to make my own decisions about whats good for me and what is not?
My assumption: You think you are going to hurt me (and you are probably right, but I am willing to take the risk), and /or you are afraid of commitment.

Your Complaint: You turn everything into a business transaction.
I think: That's the way my brain is wired. I play it all out in my head a million times and play devil's advocate and ultimately come to some kind of conclusion before even uttering a word to you.
My assumption: It is a flaw. In some way this probably hinders my communication skills. I am sure there is a way to combat this - but I don't much know what it is.

Your Complaint: I use my intellect/skills/connections to get to people.
I think: I have to bring something to the table and while I do not intentionally use those things to "make a person like me," it is something I am guilty of.
My assumption: The person thinking this is slightly jealous they are not benefiting from whatever it was I was doing for them. Also - other people probably think the same thing when viewing situations from an external point of view.

Your Complaint: (while unsaid) I am not "hot" enough.
I think: Well, dammit - thats why I have these other qualities.
My assumption: Women can never be everything a guy wants them to be, and in this case my guess is that he is too shallow for me if that is what he is focusing on.

I've been married. I've been in a relatively serious relationship since then. I've gone on dates with 20 some-odd guys since the relationship ended, and while in terms of calendar time I don't know if it is quite yet appropriate to settle into another relationship I know that I am starting to look for that. It isn't so much that I want a serious relationship, but just some consistency. I don't want to rush dating and get married in a year. I have plenty of time.

A flaw: I am pretty much nice to most guys and I am really bad at communicating the fact that I might not want to "date" them and fear I create false expectations in some cases.

I'm not perfect, no one is - but I am just sort of confused by today's man. What is the value of me being a well-rounded diverse individual that has good intentions, is committed and genuine? I guess what matters is that I get to feel good about it myself, and I get to write a somewhat conceded blog post about how I kick ass and no guy seems to want to appreciate it. Now I am just hoping this doesn't come across as desperate of some sort of personal ad. That certainly is not what was intended.

I simply imagine that there are other girls out there that have a similar problem and I guess this is a line to say - hey lady - you're not alone.

So Boooo Boys. Boooo on you for not appreciating us when we would probably be one of the best damn catches you could get.

We're winners. Don't miss your chance.

New Toys

So, in the past few posts I made reference to the new toys that I picked up over the weekend. I know it seems a bit excessive, but Circuit City had 24mths same as cash.

- Nikon D60 w/ 2 lenses: I've seriously been wanting this camera for 3 years now, and I finally broke down and got it.



- Media Center PC w/ TV Tuner Card: John built me a PC but it was a little quirky so we decided it would be better for me to buy a box and then just upgrade the components that didn't meet my needs. Well, in the store they had an open box that did everything I needed. Now, if I can only manage to get all the right cables hooked up. For some reason the digital audio out is not what I expected and I don't know
how to get the stereo hooked up. Everything else seems to work great.

- Guitar Hero: Legends of Rock - I beat half the game last night. I love it. Seriously. Fun.



- Guitar Hero: World Tour - the full band set was not in stock, but I figured the game would be enough w/ 2 guitars - maybe the rest will come at Christmas. (wink wink, nudge nudge)



- Mario Kart: Haven't played yet, but I hear it is awesome.


- Wii Fit - I need to get my butt in shape, maybe this will help motivate me.


Needless to say I have plenty to keep me busy. It just stinks I can't take my new camera to the Coldplay show. It would snap some awesome pics.

Back to the grind

Ahhh...what a weekend. It ended up being an outrageous one and I loved nearly every minute of it.

Thursday there was a happy hour/going away party for Danielle - a very important part of the team at work. She will be greatly missed. I only hope that the program does not suffer to much now that she is gone. Cleveland and Denver also played on Thursday night, so Emily (from work) and I went over to Crave to watch the game. I knew some of my buddies would be up there and Brady Quinn was starting (he is super hot). It was also trivia night. Our team ended up being "We Heart Brady Quinn" and we probably would have won if it wasn't for a few botched questions, but having Emily there really helped out. She knew lots of random stuff and filled in gaps that Dave and I would have definitely had that week. We ended up getting 2nd place. Unfortunately Cleveland also came in second place that night. My guess is that they lost because the offensive line was distracted by the hotness of Brady Quinn. :-) Matt and Shawn + all sort of other people from that crowd showed up, and at some point Dave and I decided it would be a good idea to go to Paradise Club with James T - bad idea. We did a shot of Ouzo while there - even worse idea. Speaking of shot though, I did discover Surfer on Acid though. That was tasty and discovered pre-Paradise Club. Dave and I ditched Travis there even though Kevin and Sal showed up to join us and rode back to the restaurant so Dave could head home. Well, of course Brett was sitting outside on the phone so we chatted with him and he convinced us to go over to On the Rocks for one last evening drink.

Friday I slept a good portion of the morning and then got up and Dave and I dropped my car off for an oil change and then headed to the new Lowe's store downtown as planned. "Linner" at Big Daddy's Burger Bar consisted of tots w/ pimento cheese, sliders, sweet potato fries, and a burger with habanero jack, avocado, garlic mayo, lettuce, tomato, onion. It would have been better with bacon, but heck - we needed to be responsible and conserve calories somewhere. We also decided to pop into the evil orange box down there - because it is a special format store. I have to say it was really cool. Lots of neat stuff was in there and it didn't feel like a home improvement store at all. That afternoon/evening I napped (SO stuffed from lunch). I had sort of just gotten up and messing around on the computer and trying to contemplate plans for the evening with Shawn called. I was tentatively planning to go to Gallway Hooker and see Phil & Mike play, but he let me know there was a Billy Sims show at Quaker Steak & Lube over in Concord and that the guitar he was playing was on the verge of breaking. So, I kindly met up with Ziggy Pockets at Smokin' Cuns and grabbed a backup before heading over to join them in Concord. The show was a good time, and it was the second time that weekend I had someone tell me - wow, its good to see you outside of Crave. Guess I have sort of only been going there lately. Brandon and Ziggy were doing a show at Smokin' Guns that night so Shawn and I headed out a little early hoping to catch the end of it - but we were too late.

Saturday I went shopping at Concord Mills. The only Circuit City around here is over there and I had decided to go ahead and get the comforter set I have been eying at Linens and Things, and I knew that the one here was out of stock already. I had to get a king size and was worried since I would not be able to return it, but it really looks great. I just have to get the wrinkles out of it. They were out of some of the accessory pillows, but I got those ordered this evening and should have them in 6 - 10 days. I stopped into Crave when I got back to Huntersville and the entire Ledfurd crowd was in there gettin' down so I figured heck why not...and joined in. We ended up going to Sushi at the Lake aka. Hibachi Heaven (which I think should really be Hibachi Hangover because that's where they all go after partying all night) and then out to the ranch before piling in the van to go to Greensboro for the Cold Ford show. Everyone was going cause his song, "Waffle House" features Sunny Ledfurd. It was a really good time. We rocked out playing tunes in the van all the way up there and I slept most of the way back. It was a late night and really good to go out with everyone. While I have hung around at the lake with all of them some - it was the first time I have really gone out with everyone and I think I held my own pretty well.

Today has been a pretty low key one. I got all my new toys out and played with most of them and have spent the evening messing around in iTunes, playing Guitar Hero, and hoping I will soon get tired and be ready to go to bed. I slept too much today and now don't want to go to sleep. But, I need to get there because tomorrow is back to the grind and 5:30 am will arrive early. Its going to be a busy week.

We finalized scope on stage 3 marketing & promotions and now that I have a target to work towards life is MUCH easier. There are only a few things I need to get finalized. The target is to have the BSD ready to submit on Friday. It should be doable if I can get some decisions from people pretty quickly. It will be a little touch because I will be out Tuesday and part of Wednesday. I thought it was just going to be two half days (so I can go to ATL for the Coldplay concert), but it turns out I have a doctor's appt. on Tuesday morning. I didn't think I saw the knee guy until Nov. 18th - but Friday I got a call reminding me of the appt. on the 11th. So - I guess I will just head to ATL after that as opposed to waiting until 1:00 to hit the road. No point in going into the office for 2 hrs. I am going to stay with Tara in ATL that night. I really can't wait until the concert. It is going to rock! I am also interested to know what the knee guy is going to say. At least it has not swollen again since I had the fluid pulled off of it the second time. I don't know if it is because of the steroid she shot in there, or the anti-inflammatory Rx she gave me.

Friday night Ledfurd and the Piedmont Boys are doing a show out in Greensboro so we are going to party down up there that night. One of my friends from work is actually going to go. She is friends with B-Stikks girlfriend Paula. We are also trying to convince Danielle to come up for the show - but I don't know how much she would really like it. They are a rough crowd. Saturday there is a Billy Sims show at Smokin' Guns - so there won't be much rest for the weary.

I must go to bed now (even though I am not really tired). The alarm goes off in 4.5 hours.

Smart Idea of the Week: National Deficit Contribution Fund

As I was recovering from a fun Thursday night I laid on my sofa watching CNN and the coverage from Obama's press conference on economic issues. While there sort of half sleeping through what seemed like the 20th replay of the press conference it dawned on me...

We have the largest deficit ever, and taxes are inevitable going to go up. People will be looking for ways to decrease taxable income as much as possible in order to save dough. This year I am actually in a crappy position when it comes to taxes, but it is what it is. There are ways to reduce taxable income, but it all has caps and limits. This is where my idea comes in.

The government needs to create a National Deficit Contribution Funds. 100% of the monies donated to the fund are directly applied to the national deficit, and the dollars that individuals contribute are deducted from their taxable income. So, the government still gets money anyway and individuals are able to save in tax dollars.

Yes, you can donate to charities to achieve the same effect (to some extent), but isn't the stability of our country's economy a pretty worthy cause?

There are surely some flaws, but I thought this might be worthy of conversation.

Kitty Khronicle: Week 1

Week One with King Sebastian has been pretty cool. I can definitely say that he is perfectly at home here, and today has been an especially great day. We took our first nap together on the sofa, and he has been playing with his toys all over the place. I keep finding random mice and other toys around the house in different places, and sometimes he likes to drag his feather stick toy around the house. It is amusing.

Most nights he stays locked out of bedroom, or gets thrown out at some point just because he ends up attacking me too much or is fascinated with rubbing his head against my face. I imagine he will grow out of the attacking, but I don't know about the face rubbing.

Some big things from this week...

- I learned that he only likes "grilled" Fancy Feast cat food (after asking his foster mom why he wasn't eating the food I had been putting down for him.

- Tuesday night, about 2:00 am he fell in the toilet - which was pretty darn funny. I heard some sort of racket and thought he had knocked something over, but after looking around didn't see anything in the living room or bedroom. Bathroom was the last stop. I thought it might have been shampoo knocked over into the tub. No. But I paused cause the floor was wet, and that didn't make any sense. After pondering for a moment I noticed the toilet seat had kitty paws on it and everything started to come together. I went back into the hall to turn off the light and saw him sitting there doing the paw flinging thing and licking himself. The toilet swimming was then confirmed. Shawn was over one day (Thursday maybe) and he went into the hall bathroom where he apparently started KS and again the cat went for a little dip.

- He meowed. :-) It hasn't been often, but he is doing it. He is also making some other noises, just grunting and chattery sort of stuff. It's cute.

- After our nap this afternoon he laid on the sofa next to me while I trimmed all his claws. No ordeal what so ever. He was just chillin.

- And he is currently being a very good boy and sitting in my lap while I type. I try to keep him off the desk and he is being very good about it. Although, his purring is sort of drowning out Jason Mraz.

Got a new camera this weekend (more info to come) and these are some pics I took of him this evening. Check out all his photos on Flickr.

Lean Cuisine's "Revolutionary Grilling Tray"

I am eating my Lean Cuisine Chicken, Spinach, & Mushroom Pannini and am pleasantly surprised. Its quite tasty, and the "Revolutionary Grilling Tray" does toast the bread. Not bad at all. I do think the word "revolutionary" is a bit much through. "Super Fantastic" might have been better, but still a stretch. I nominate "Darn Nifty." There is a patent pending on the little widget though. I really wanted Zaxby's today for lunch, but was good and when I ran my errands to the band and post office, returned here for the cheaper - more healthy alternative. Matt Cope and I may go tomorrow. Considering it will be like a Friday I might suck it up and say OK. I believe I will be eating horribly for lunch on Friday though. Dave and I have been talking about venturing downtown to check out the new format Lowe's store in the Dilworth area then going to eat at Big Daddy's Burger Bar. Yum-O!

I'm kind of getting on a roll with cooking though (did it 2 nights in a row now, and planning on doing it tonight). Last night was not quite as good as the pork chops from Monday, but still pretty darn tasty. I roasted onions and tomatoes then sauteed shrimp, chopped them up, and mixed it all together and used it as filling for lettuce wraps. I pulled a chicken breast the size of Wyoming out of the freezer to thaw for dinner tonight. I am torn between just pan frying it and eating with collard greens or something - and - pounding it out and making a chicken roll of sorts with herbed cream cheese. Both are equally good options.

Cat Rule: Leave on Music or TV

One of the cat rules was to leave on music or the TV when you are away so the cat will be ...well... I don't exactly remember that part. Maybe so he won't be lonely, or something. Either way, today KS is listening to the new Keane album. I guess I will check it out when I get home. Yesterday he listened to the new Ben Folds. I listened to the new Ben Folds last night while cooking dinner. And by dinner, I mean some hella-fantastic eats. French-style green beans sauteed with onions, red-skinned mashed potatoes with goat cheese, and seared pork chops topped with fig preserves, goat cheese, and caramelized onions. I treated Dave because he was super helpful and installed shelves at my house on Sunday.

The new Ben Folds album is pretty good. But different. Its a fun album to listen to. I think my favorite song is the single they are currently playing on Sirius. "You Don't Know Me" is the title. And it is totally possible. I wouldn't say I've experienced a severe instance of it, but know that its a dangerous road. To go through the everyday and not talk about what really matters with someone. And it doesn't necessarily have to be in a romantic relationship. It could be with a
mother, father, or good friend. Perhaps a challenge is in order...today, take a moment (after you vote) to have a good conversation and get into the head of someone close to you.

Lyrics of: You Don't Know Me, Ben Folds

wanna ask you -
Do you ever sit and wonder,
It's so strange
That we could be together for
So long, and never know, never care
What goes on in the other one's head?

Things I've felt but I've never said
You said things that I never said
So I'll say something that I should have said long ago:

(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all
(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all (at all)

You could have just propped me up on the table like a mannequin
Or a cardboard stand-up and paint me (paint me)
Any face that you wanted me
To be seen.
We're
Damned by the existential moment where
We saw the couple in the coma and
It was we were the cliché,
But we carried on anyway.

So, sure, I could just close my eyes.
Yeah, sure, trace and memorize,
But can you go back once you know

You don't know me)
You don't know me at all
(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all (at all)

(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all
(You don't know me)
You don't know me

If I'm the person that you think I am (Ah ah ahh)
Clueless chump you seem to think I am (Ah ah ahhh)
So easily led astray,
An errant dog who occasionally escapes and needs a shorter leash, then
Why the f**k would you want me back?!

Maybe it's because

(You don't know me at all)

Ahhh ah
Ahhh ah

(You don't know me,
you don't know me.)

Ahhh ah
Ahhh ah

So, what I'm trying to say is
What (What?)
I'm trying to tell you
It's not gonna come out like I wanna say it cause I know you'll only change it.
(Say it.)

(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all
(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all (at all)

(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all
(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all (at all)

What?

(Mmmm, ohh oh
Ah ah ah ah ah
Aha ah ah ah
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Aha ah
Ah ah
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
Oh-oh-oh-oh oh ohh)

It was after dinner last night that KS sort of let himself come through. Jenny, Shaun, and Dave were over to watch MNF and I figured kitty would stay under the sofa the entire time, but no - he was a total ham. Out and about playing and purring. Shawn ending up stopping by to meet him and the outgoing mood continued ... unfortunately it continued most of the night too - in the form of purring and harassing me while I tried to sleep. Between that and several coughing attacks I might have gotten 3 hours of sleep. For some reason I feel great through - bring on the day!

Alright. Mid-morning break over. Been super productive so far and I can't afford to break the momentum.

King Sebastian

All hail thee King Sebastian. :-) No, you don't really have to, but do stop by to say hello if you happen to be in the area. My mom came up for the weekend and we were talking about how I was dog crazy (better than baby crazy). I had to run an errand near Pet Smart, so we decided to pop in and have a look at the puppies, but there were only kitties. I've always enjoyed having cats - until Mr. Suki that is. He was awful (God bless him) - and I really don't have a lifestyle suited for a dog, so when we started looking at the cats I was easily swayed.

His given name is King, but I didn't love it, and I think he looks like a "Sebastian," so the name is modified. He is about 6 months old, and the Humane Society of Iredell County rescued him from Animal Control when he was a kitten. While friendly, he is still a little shy, but once you get him out he will purr, purr, purr. I would tell the story about all the "rules" of adopting him, but it would be boring to read, and I don't want to make light of the proper way to care for an animal. He did come with a 45 minute "How to care for your cat" DVD though. Haven't had a chance to watch it yet. Not sure when I will.

But, he is a cool cat.

Check out pics of him.